No Hassle Returns...
Today we decided to return Ruby- our shelter dog- to the place where we adopted her. The decision was not an easy one and we debated for quite sometime. In the end, she had to go. So I set out with Ruby, Dillon, and Caleb in tow. Naturally we stop by McDonald's for road trip necessities. Then we're off...An hour later I'm handing over the little girl. Apparently it was more difficult for me than the kids, as the only tears shed were my own. Dillon was a little upset so I suggested we drive a little further to Pawpaw's farm. As we pull in we see the neighbor's dogs. We get out to pet and play with the pups when out of nowhere comes a prehistorically large bumble bee. As if some magnetic pull was connecting the bee to my head, he found sanctuary on my bun....
Dear God, I'm in the middle of Freeport, no adult in site, and I am HIGHLY allergic to bees. So what else could I do but bend over. Yeah, I don't know. I panicked. I had the mindset that perhaps I could "tip" him off. No, it didn't work. At Dillon's first suggestion to hit it with a stick I scoffed- and have it sting me in the head?? I don't think so! So I tried various alternatives such as shaking my head, slowly. Walking under a bush multiple times. Walking quickly in hopes of generating a breeze. Now keep in mind that I could feel the hitchhiker walking around my head as if I were the food court and he couldn't decide on Chick fil A or Panda Express... After 10 minutes- yes TEN minutes- of failed attempts, I handed Dillon a stick. Dear Lord I take back what I said about that Oriental lady at the stop light... A swing and a miss... "Did you get him??" Dill-"No I think he is making a nest in your bun". "Shit"...giggles erupt. "Concentrate Dillon, now knock him off!" Swoosh, Bzzzzz.... "OMG what's he doing Dillon?" "I think he's mad now, but he won't let go." You have GOT to be kidding me. No one for miles, no Epi-pen and not sure how long it takes my throat to swell completely shut after initial sting....Okay, stay calm. The bee can't stay there forever, right? I should not have washed my hair. Damn Aveda's natural floral essence. "Dill, we can do this." "But I'm scared I'm gonna hit you." "Just hit me!" Whack...nothing. Swing...miss, swoosh, bzzz....
Okay, that's it. I grabbed my Ann Taylor sunglasses and beat myself repeatedly in the head until the thing plunged to his death. Phew... 20 minutes later we are back in the car. I calmly explain to the boys why it was imperative to remove the giant creature from my head before it stung me and no I am not a wuss dadgummit. Well maybe...Satisfied with my explanation I start the engine and we set out once more for a long trip. As we're driving home I hear Cal from the back seat, "Does anybody hear that buzzing sound?....."
Dear God, I'm in the middle of Freeport, no adult in site, and I am HIGHLY allergic to bees. So what else could I do but bend over. Yeah, I don't know. I panicked. I had the mindset that perhaps I could "tip" him off. No, it didn't work. At Dillon's first suggestion to hit it with a stick I scoffed- and have it sting me in the head?? I don't think so! So I tried various alternatives such as shaking my head, slowly. Walking under a bush multiple times. Walking quickly in hopes of generating a breeze. Now keep in mind that I could feel the hitchhiker walking around my head as if I were the food court and he couldn't decide on Chick fil A or Panda Express... After 10 minutes- yes TEN minutes- of failed attempts, I handed Dillon a stick. Dear Lord I take back what I said about that Oriental lady at the stop light... A swing and a miss... "Did you get him??" Dill-"No I think he is making a nest in your bun". "Shit"...giggles erupt. "Concentrate Dillon, now knock him off!" Swoosh, Bzzzzz.... "OMG what's he doing Dillon?" "I think he's mad now, but he won't let go." You have GOT to be kidding me. No one for miles, no Epi-pen and not sure how long it takes my throat to swell completely shut after initial sting....Okay, stay calm. The bee can't stay there forever, right? I should not have washed my hair. Damn Aveda's natural floral essence. "Dill, we can do this." "But I'm scared I'm gonna hit you." "Just hit me!" Whack...nothing. Swing...miss, swoosh, bzzz....
Okay, that's it. I grabbed my Ann Taylor sunglasses and beat myself repeatedly in the head until the thing plunged to his death. Phew... 20 minutes later we are back in the car. I calmly explain to the boys why it was imperative to remove the giant creature from my head before it stung me and no I am not a wuss dadgummit. Well maybe...Satisfied with my explanation I start the engine and we set out once more for a long trip. As we're driving home I hear Cal from the back seat, "Does anybody hear that buzzing sound?....."
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